Bonus Entry: Dear Noob...

I got a message a bit ago that I couldn't help but want to share, and why make you guys wait for it? I'm not totally cruel and evil... Wait. Yes, I am. Never mind.

Anyway, be sure to read the previous entry if you haven't, as it's today's 'official' entry. This is just for your amusement.

Look! From -Brook-, sent on 2011-04-07 at 09:57:23

For one, I'm not a low level noob. I'm way past a noob. I have every right to make suggestions. You are not the boss of everyone!Just beacuase your a legend, does not mean you can do everything. And also, I just had that on my mind, I was not saying it to be so. But I think you should work on not being do bossy to every lower rank.

To put this in context, I haven't had any communication with anyone by this name within the past week, I don't recall any suggestions I shot down by this person (I even scanned the topic starters on the first page - no results), and their profile was a bunch of garbage and no help in identifying them.

However, I had nothing better to do at the moment, so...

RE:Look! To -Brook-, sent on 2011-04-07 at 11:45:05

Dear low level noob,

Thank you for writing to demonstrate how much of a noob you really are. Your message gave me a few laughs, and I will be sure to show it around as an example of the pinnacle of noob-dom.

Of course, your message would probably be more meaningful if I knew who the fuck you are. However, I don't happen to remember dealing with you within the past week, so either you're the slowest typist in existence or a side account of some noob I shot down on the forums.

But, don't worry about it, because I honestly don't care who the hell you are, as you're obviously beneath my notice, as I am uninterested in dealing with 11 year old noobs who cannot even use correct grammar.

Assuming that I did, at one point, actually waste my time in addressing your existence, then maybe you should consider the fact that there is no reason whatsoever why I am required to value your opinion at all. In fact, I'm not even required to acknowledge you exist; consider yourself lucky to have been allotted even a passing notice.

Also, you may wish to reconsider why exactly you presume that I actually give a damn about your opinion of me. Your message seems more like an 11 year old insistent on getting the last word in than anything else, as any logical person would have concluded that messaging me about whatever I presumably did to you is pointless, as I am decidedly unapologetic about my actions. Therefore, I am forced to conclude that you have no emotional maturity at all and are simply yet another young noob who shouldn't even be on the site in the first place.

On an off note, if you think so little of me, you may wish to reconsider what you post on your profile. That XP/Level/Rank list? I wrote it. As well as just about all of the actually useful info pertaining to the site. So, if you really hate my guts, then you will not use it, or any info I have written. Please enjoy being a low leveled noob forever, as W-H is clearly too complicated for you to figure out without someone instructing you on everything.

Oh, wait. You already are a low leveled noob. My bad. Carry on.

As for complaining about me being bossy, allow me to first congratulate you on using such a mature insult, as it definitely isn't something that is almost exclusively said by young children.

It is also a completely incorrect term, as the fact remains that I do not, actually, boss people around. While I freely admit to applying indiscriminate insults to almost everyone around, you will not actually be able to find me ordering anyone around, unless it is a case of common sense.

Not to mention that you attempting to force your opinions on me is 'bossy' in an of itself, clearly proving you are a complete hypocrite. Perhaps next time, when you are inevitably complaining about someone's behavior, you should consider that you have no right to enforce your beliefs on proper behavior on them.

Again, thank you for wasting part of your insignificant life writing to me. I sincerely wish to never hear from you again, so please refrain from contacting me for a period of no less than 4,672 years from the current date of April 7th, 2011, 3:44 PM PST.

Probably the only person who will ever waste their time on your pointless existence,
-Stormgaze
 
For the record, I did actually look after I sent this, and there is actually a message from this person in my inbox, about five pages back... from nearly 2 weeks ago. Yeah, I'll go with the slowest typist in existence option here.

Said message didn't shed any light on whatever they're talking about, though, and I wasn't able to find my response to them (if I sent one) in my outbox (I send a lot more messages than I receive (unless people are throwing glass at me >.>) so it's harder to search for). And, really, it wasn't worth any more effort, as I really don't care.

And yes, I did deliberately go out of my way to be extra wordy and all that. Basically the entire point of the message was to mock the noob. I'm not actually ascribing extreme importance to myself or anything. This isn't intended to be serious or anything.

(Oh, and the noob ignored what I said about not being contacted again and sent back an irrelevant reply of a few words, which I ignored. If they do actually message me again, I'm going to report them).

Having said that, I will use this to make one point. I really, really despise people who complain because the high levels don't agree with everything they said. We use levels to judge overall experience on the site, not as a means of discrimination. There are high levels that nobody gives a shit about their opinion as well - like Rodeo on this thread, who is apparently incapable of reading the post above mine. Yes, I just used a completely unrelated topic to insult them. Deal with it.

Anyway, back to low levels complaining about anything high levels due based on the grounds that it's simply discrimination against them for being low levels... that's crap. That's like claiming someone is racist against your ethnic group because they disagree with you. Yes, I just made a flawed analogy. Who cares?

Anyway, enjoy the letter!